When Your Thoughts Get Too Loud

I had a conversation with a friend a few days ago, where she shared something with me that completely changed the way I see (and feel) my thoughts:

It happened late at night.

The house was quiet. The kind of quiet where thoughts feel louder than they should. The day had already ended, but the weight of it hadn’t.

Nothing dramatic had gone wrong. Just a heaviness that settled in without asking permission.

So she grabbed a notebook.

Every thought went down exactly as it appeared. Messy. Sharp. Unfiltered.

“I’m behind.”
“I messed that up.”
“This shouldn’t feel this hard.”

Then she slowed down and asked one simple question:

Is this thought actually true?

Some thoughts softened immediately. Others asked for more attention.

So she kept going.

How do I feel when I think this?
How do I act when I believe it?
What direction does this thought lead me?

Thoughts create paths.

Certain thoughts led to tension.
Others drained energy.
A few pulled everything inward, making the world feel smaller.

Then came the most important step: she rewrote the thought.

Not in a forced, overly positive way. Just a grounded alternative. One that could also be true.

“I’m learning.”
“I handled that with what I had.”
“This season is shaping me.”

She sat with each new thought and asked the same question again:

Is this true?

Something shifted.

The circumstances stayed the same. But her breathing slowed, her shoulders relaxed, and the heaviness loosened its grip.

She realized her thoughts had been driving the emotion. 

Direction follows attention.

By the time she reached the bottom of the page, the sadness no longer felt in control. It felt understood.

This practice does something powerful.

It turns awareness into clarity.
Clarity into choice.
And choice into direction.

When thoughts stay unexamined, they run freely.
But when they’re written down, they become visible.
And when they’re questioned, they become manageable.

Over time, their intensity fades.

Scripture speaks to this wisdom when it says, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” (Romans 12:2).

You are not your thoughts. 

You are the one who decides which thoughts you keep.

Sadness loses power when it is examined.
Fear softens when it is questioned.
Peace grows when truth is invited in.

So the next time your mind starts to spiral, pause.

Pick up a pen.
Write it down.
Ask better questions.

God meets us there.
Not in pretending everything is fine.
But in choosing truth over fear.

And little by little, the heaviness lifts.